Aaron's Paper 1
From Mizzou Wiki
Times have changed and students have changed along with them. The Wesch video is a prime example of how higher education may ask a little much of a person. The present student may go through more than expected behind classes and in their real life.-DeTar says, so true!- Wesch brought up many great issues that all effect the average student. People fail to see the issues that a young student has in his her life.-older people don't fail to see, we have have simply forgotten- Maybe class and technology asks much, may not.-this phrasing needs attention- The issues that were illustrated in the video is the money issue and how it is the governing system of how far you can get in education, than there is the loss of class connection between classmate to classmate and mainly classmate to teacher, and lastly the issue of what school expects of the student with their time of day.-sentence too long, needs better phrasing- Wesch hit hard on these issues so people can finally realize whats going on. So does this video actually depict the student of today?, and if so how are they connected.
The average college student pays 9,000 dollars at a four year college annually. The average household income is no more than 48,000 dollars. Though 13% fall below poverty level and over 20% of the house holds make under 20,000 dollars a year. Once again as Wesch was trying to prove, college has forgotten the life behind the curtains. There are expenses, bill, food, and luxury that all must be paid and many can't afford, not just in the U.X., but all around the world.-this trend has not changed in thousands of years- In the video Wesch used the statistic that the price of a laptop cost more than many make in a year. It also uses that many kids are greatly in debt after their degree is obtained.-again phrasing needs attention- Why does college tuition cost so much for an education? This being the big issue of today in our schools, but many can;t answer this question, the only known fat is that tuition is increasing in an increasing rate. And now as expenses go up, the supplies necessary for school also goes up. You almost have to have a laptop to go to college now a days due to the requirements for classes such as constant emails, daily online assignments, and constant access which also hurts your pockets. This leads to the second big issue in school now.
So the "distant" education is what separates students from their classrooms. The statistics used by Wesch was that only 18% of that students' teachers know their name and one has even had an average class of 128 people. There are many factors that help a student become successful and one of them is a relationship to ones teacher. A more personal environment in class is a great way for students to exceed, bug-but?- that connection has been lost over the years. The computer has been the basis for all types of education and work and the running of general classes now. During the video it shows how one student had to write over 500 emails pertaining to class which shows how it is hard for a student to speak to their teacher for help on a more personal basis. How far has technology gone in school, and how far will we let it take us? We do gain much from technology, though we lose in some cases, much more.
The expectations of classes has also increased. The simple planning or scheduling of the daily bases may not just cut it any more. There is sleep, eating, jobs, relaxing, studying, and class that must be taken care of all in one day. It showed in the video that many of these day to day errands and duties add up to be more that just 24 hours, but actually over 26 hours necessary in your day. That is impossible to accomplish, thus leading to time cuts to certain duties and obligations that would have helped, but now can only hurt a student if were cut. Every change can be a double edged sword. If one gets less hours of sleep, he'll be less motivated or energetic in class, if one cuts work hours down to get studying in, he loses money, and vice versa. There just isn't the time of day to do many of the things required. It's as if teachers want their student, if they even know their student that is , to be totally class bases which can be possible, but definitely no logical.-whole sentence needs rephrasing- Wesch's video is determined to make a change to this issue.
Many of the problems of school were pin pointed in Wesch's video and were displayed in a strong unique way that was interesting to the audience. The video very abrupt, yet subtle created a sign to all. Wesch's video was directed to all, not just a specific audience. because anyone can make a change. This video really opened the eyes of many and showed them things that many wouldn't even believe. This video was a signal to not just an audience outside of the students, but pointed towards them also. All can learn from this video and Wesch chose a great way to illustrate his thoughts.
Colin's Peer Review
You definitely cover all the issues brought up in Wesch's video, from the financial aspect to the personal aspect. Also you make a good point about the amount of time and energy needed to be dedicated towards school and how it probably won't ever be enough. I think your thesis is a good subject to speak on and I think I understand your argument. The only thing I would change are the spelling and grammatical errors, also there are definitions or mention of cultural literacy or competence.
-DeTar says, The paper was good as a whole. Please look carefully at the way your sentences are structured, as it is the reader has to stop and fix the message in their head before proceeding. Spelling and grammer needs work. Revising a rough draft can get rid of pesky errors although the overall structure will need more revising.Thanks for listening-
